Mr. Farnaby’s head
by P.S.Gifford
forum: Mr. Farnaby’s head
speculative fiction for the internet generation.

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Mr. Farnaby’s head


           Mr. Steve Farnaby is a likeable and congenial chap. He is the sort of man that you can not fail to have an immediate affinity for. Mr. Farnaby is kind, considerate and generous beyond compare. In fact he is perhaps the most unlikely character to have a nightmare-but indeed a nightmare was precisely what he was experiencing as he lay in his resting place.

           He had gone to bed in the usual fashion after having sampled a really good couple of pints of ale and a rather tasty few slices of aged cheddar cheese and some old English pickle. Steve always appreciated the finest things in life. Now, however, despite being sound asleep he was still very much highly agitated. His eyelids were fluttering beyond control and the debonair Mr. Farnaby was obviously experiencing extreme radical rapid eye movement that accompanies dream activity. His body was gently gyrating from side to side and glistening droplets of sweat had begun to form on his troubled brow.


           “Allow us to take a closer look. Let us slip into his mind and see exactly what he is experiencing? Are you feeling brave? Don't worry I shall be right next to you. I have experience in such matters. Now, Imagine yourself entering his dream state and concentrate with me. Concentrate hard on each and every word in front of you. Ah yes, our journey has begun.

           Here we are! That wasn't so bad now was it? Where on Earth are we? Oh everybody asks that at first. Don't worry, as long as we can make it back to the front of the mind we can still get out. It’s a mystery to me too how I began doing this-it just began happening when I was about thirteen. I somehow enter through the conscious which then allows me to explore the unconscious. Yes, yes I know it is weird, but all rather exciting too don‘t you think? Wow! What a place. All these different rooms you can see are the different part of Mr. Farnaby’s mind. See that room over there with the angelic glow about it? That’s where he keeps the memories of when his children were born and his wedding day, the happiest times of his life. He visits that room often. Hear that? That is where he keeps his musical talent! Great beat to it huh? Here’s one of my favourit e rooms-childhood memories, can you smell those cookies baking, delicious! But we are getting sidetracked, alas, where we want to go is into where his nightmare is occurring you see if I find the source destroy it. If we are successful, you see, he will no longer have the nightmares. I regard it as my personal crusade. Ah yes, just over this way, I can hear the screaming. Here we are! Just through here. A little bit further-are you still with me? Good! I thought I lost you for a moment. I am going to need your help I suspect! That is why I invited you. It is just through this gate. Here give me hand-thanks-boy that is one heavy gate. You can see he doesn't venture down here too often; this must be the cellar of his mind. Wow, this place is simply amazing! What a truly remarkable mind Mr. Farnaby has he is without question one of the deepest thinkers I have ever encountered.

           This is creepy! I am surprised that Mr. Farnaby hides an area like this within him, I was expecting dark and dreary yet this is beyond my wildest imagination, be careful. He always seems so pleasant! Anyhow we shall soon discover his deepest and darkest fears. Come on let us go in a little further I know it is kind of spooky in here, but you are quite right! Wait! Wasn't that some kind of movement over there? What on earth is that! Oh God it is running towards us. Wait…WAIT…Don't… Please! What is happening?

           Oh my goodness sake, are you okay? It seems that we have stumbled on Mr. Farnaby’s biggest fear-spiders-giant bloody spiders. Most people’s fears are relatively small, and I have had no trouble defeating them…But these monsters? Oh no, what’s happening now? They appear to be wrapping us up in silk and I can't seem to move. Please, please don't scream we should not panic as I am sure I can get us out of this. I am sure I can”


           A few hours later Steve awoke restless and with a terrible throbbing headache, ‘Yuk,’ he thought ‘too much beer last night!” Then his wife’s angelic voice filled the room.

           “Are you alright darling?”

           “Yes Honey, I guess so, but boy what a terrible dream I experienced last night. It was all about giant spiders. I never did like those horrid eight-legged things, ever since I was a little nipper and a bloody gigantic daddy long legs swiftly ran across my cheek. I was too scared even to move, all I could do was watch on helpless. I have been terrified of spiders ever since sweetheart.”

           "I will go and bring you a cup of tea and an aspirin luv."And with that Mrs. Farnaby scurried downstairs leaving Steve alone.

           He decided to shrug off the uneasy feelings he was experiencing and to get on with the mundane bathroom routine of his day. But just as he began to brush his teeth a rather peculiar thing happened. He was looking at his weary reflection in the mirror, and was convinced that he could hear tiny agonizing screams coming from deep inside his own head.


The end




copyright 2005 P.S.Gifford.

P.S.Gifford is a transplanted Englishman living deep in the heart of the O.C. California. To his utter amazement he continues to have increasing writing credits accumulate.He is currently working on his first full fledged novel.